I'm so used to see my dad being healthy. He's the strongest man. He can do everything on his own. Houseworks as well. He's my hero. He's my rock.

But seeing him getting sicker day by day for the past weeks opened up my eyes. It gives me some kind of wake up call. That he's not as strong as he used to be. He's now relying on us on few things that he used to do himself. 

Sometimes i feel like part of it was my fault. Ever heard of kifarah? The sickness becomes smthg tht cleanse away our sins. And being an unmarried daughter, he still carries mine. Astaghfirullahal'azim.

Ya Allah, please cure him. Please lift up the burden from him. We still need him. Tell me what should i do. I'll do anything for him. Guide me there. Please...

Nak kata dulu aku ni player..rasanya tak. Yg dok kena main dgn player adala. Tp pernah la few times kecewakan hati org. Bukan aku lead the wrong idea. At that moment, aku dh bgtau situasi aku camne. And aku x mampu nk bls blk..

Bila dh lama2, aku terfikir.. Adakah salah sorang mereka dh 'menyumpah' aku so dat..aku lak rasa cam diorang kena?

Roda kan bulat. Karma akn dtg jugak lama/sekejap. Itu aku tau. Aku jugak redha.

Tapi ntah la ek. Aku gagal nk deny rasa yg dtg skali skala ni. Ada masa aku berjaya la.. Buat dek.

Smlm aku mimpi sesak nafas. Mcm pendek2 & tersekat2. 50-50. Buat aku terfikir...

Mungkin slh satu sebab, adalah perjalanan aku xpanjang mana?